Friday, December 16, 2005

pre Christmas Update

Upcoming Comedy
Thursday, January 5 - Yuk Yuks
Upcoming writin
Friday, January 30 - New Year's Resolutions, the Edmonton Journal

Happy Holidays Everyone! I wish everyone and their families all the best.

-And what goes with Christmas better than zombies? All this week I'll be answering questions in the forums at about my short story "Glass Houses." Where can I get a copy of "Glass Houses" I hear you ask? Why it's available in the anthology "Cold Flesh, which you can purchase on line at

-I had the pleasure of meeting a woman named CARISSA REINIGER after the show on Sunday. Not only is she the president of a company called Silver Lining (, along with Sarah Hutchison and Karen Henderson, she's edited a book called STORIES FROM OUR BLACK BOOKS, a compilation of stories from Canadian women who have played the dating game. LARS bought a copy, partially to learn female dating secrets, but more likely to see how many of the stories have his name in them. Still it looks great, and if you're looking for a gift for a mom, sister, girfriend, etc. check out for more.

-I hooked a couple of women at my day job on the 'whacky-mole' game at I deserve a finder's fee. Or at least have my picture in the Memory Game.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Office gossip

Wednesday, December 14 - Yuk Yuks
Sunday, December 18 - The Comic Strip, Edmonton
Thursday, January 5 - Yuk Yuks, Edmonton

Friday, December 16 - Christmas Shopping in the Edmonton Journal Living Section
Friday, December 30 - New Year's in the Edmonton Journal Living Section

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears in every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine.

-Had a good time on Sunday. The crowd at THE COMIC STRIP was fantastic. Before the show headliner JOHN WESSLING--a great guy--gave us a preview of his documentary HELLGIG USA, where Wessling and two other comics played 50 shows in 50 days in the 50 American states (Yes, that includes Alaska and Hawaii). Now that's doing it for the love of the game. Very inspirational. Afterwards, Wessling hung out with us for a bit, delivered a phenomenal show, and left in the company of a pair of 'exotic dancers' he met the night before. Like I said, very inspirational

-Also on Sunday, KELLY SOLODUKA established his presence as a new ladies' man in town--he convinced a pair of lovelies from a local spa to join the comics for drinks after the show. Funny thing was, he hadn't even performed that night. Looks like LARS has got himself some competition. I, of course, was a perfect gentleman.

-Monday, POWERMANN and I went to the Sidetrack open stage where we put on an absolutely ludicrous vaudeviller routine. It was a pretty good crowd too--the extremely talented human beat box SHAMMIK (sp?) was celebrating his birthday. In hindsight, with that sort of crowd, we should have done a regular show, but a few people enjoyed it, and just like John Wessling, sometimes you have to do stuff for the love of the game. Say good night, Powermann.

-Is there another Dan B playing the memory game at I'm sure I've never scored higher than the low fifties.

Saturday, December 10, 2005


-Congratuations to MARK SALAMANDICK and LARS CALLIEOU for making the semi-finals in the Corner Gas comedy competition. It's always fantastic to see things starting together for guys you've worked with and admire. Mark is part of a writing group I frequent along with J.P FOURNIER, SHAWN GRAMIAK, and TODD K (speaking of Todd, I finally broke my old high-score of 50 on the memory game on his website at I'm told Mark and J.P. also recently recorded sets for XM radio, so that's another feather in their cap. As far as Lars goes, I can't keep up with all the things he's doing these days. He recently showcased for Just For Laughs, so their may be some Montreal in his future. Check out Mark and Lars' sets in the Comic Genius section of

Friday, December 09, 2005

November headLINES and updates

Upcoming Comedy
Sunday, December 11 - The Comic Strip, Edmonton
Sunday, December 18 - The Comic Strip, Edmonton
Thursday, January 5 - Yuk Yuks, Edmonton

Friday, December 16 - Christmas Shopping in the Edmonton Journal Living Section
Friday, December 30 - New Year's in the Edmonton Journal Living Section

And of course, Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears in ed every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal etc. etc. etc.

-Exciting times ahead...unfortunately, with the exception of my next middle show at Yuks on January 5, nothing's been confirmed yet. Watch this space for the glorious details. In the meantime, here are November's headLINES

Tuesday, November 1 - The NBA regular season is underway with a brand new look, courtesy of Commissioner David Stern's new dress code. The NBA: Come for the basketball--Stay for the fashion. Says Indiana Pacers bad boy Ron Artest: "Not only does my new Prada handbag bring out my eyes, there's plenty of room for my brass knuckles for when we go back to Detroit."

Wednesday, November 2 - Senior U.S. Vice Presidential aide Lewis 'Scooter' Libby is charged with perjury, false statements, and obstruction of justice after it is discovered that his nickname is not really 'Scooter,' but 'Watermelon-Butt.' The real Scooter--the stage manager for The Muppet Show--declined to comment.

Thursday, November 2 - A number of Calgary companies have been caught in an oil-for-food scandal involving Saddam Hussein's former Iraqi regime. It's like an episode of Arrested Development with cowboy hats. All that's missing is Henry Winker and a stair-car.

Friday, November 3 - Raffi 'Scooter' Torres is charged with perjury, false statements, and obstruction of justice after it is discovered that his name is neither 'Raffi' nor 'Torres,' but just Scooter. The real Tico Torres--Bon Jovi's drummer--and children's entertainer Raffi both declined to comment.

Saturday, November 5 - Two weeks ago, I made fun of Sean Fleming and he led the Esks to victory with five consecutive field goals. Last week I made fun of Raffi Torres and he scored the winning goal in overtime against the Red Wings the night before the issue went to press. I think I'm onto something. Hey, Stoll! Hemsky! You guys suck! Don't rush to thank me at once, Edmonton.

Sunday, November 6 - U2 lead singer Bono is one of the backers in a merger involving Edmonton-based game company BioWare. I guess after playing Jade Empire he found what he was looking for.

Monday, November 7 - Rumor has it the NDP may try to force a Christmas election. Is 'None of the Above' going to be on the ballot? At least I'll have a legitimate excuse for not getting my shopping done.

Tuesday, November 8 - Embattled Conservative leader Stephen Harper says he's ready for a Christmas election. He's got his concession and farewell speeches ready and everything.

Wednesday, November 9 - November in Edmonton seems like a weird time to have a rodeo. Then aagain, nothing says "Yee-HAW" like sliding your Corolla uncontrollably through the Groat Road traffic circle.

Thursday, November 10 - Paul Martin says a Christmas election will grind government business to a halt. After all, a lot of those companies involved in the sponsorship scandal expect Christmas bonuses. Taxpayer dollars aren't going to give themselves away, you know.

Friday, November 11 - On Remembrance Day, I like to remember my great-uncle, a contestant on a show called 'Survivor: Vimy Ridge.' He didn't get a million dollars, but he never had to buy another drink for the rest of his life and he got a metal plate in his head that won him an astonishing number of bar bets. Kind of puts things in perspective, doesn't it?

Saturday, November 12 - NDP leader Jack Layton is politely asking Paul Martin's Liberals to pretty please make the decision to step down and call an election--a patently ridiculous strategy. The 'call an election part' is fine; the 'asking Paul Martin to make a decision' is the impossible part.

Sunday, November 13 - RIP Eddie Guerrero (1967-2005). Hope heaven is ready for some "Lyin', Cheatin,' & Stealin.'"

Monday, November 14 - As riots rock the streets, France continues to cement its reputation as a wussy country by becoming the first nation in history to surrender to itself. Ha-Ha! The only thing more fun than making fun of France is making fun of Toronto.

Tuesday, November 15 - Speaking of which, If you were part of an Alberta police force whose mandate was 'to regain the trust of the public,' would you hire a guy from Toronto? That's what I thought. At least the ethics watchdog can relax a little--the Leafs are only in town once this season.

Wednesday, November 16 - Apparently there are a lot of holes in the case against Saddam Hussein. Unfortunately, they're bullet holes, and they can be found in the torso of his defence team. He doesn't need Perry Mason. He needs 50-Cent and his bulletproof vest.

Thursday, November 17 - Has there ever been a 'Survivor' contestant more unappealing than Judd? And don't bother e-mailing me about Jonny Fairplay--At least he was interesting. If you gave me a choice between hanging out with Judd or having my brains eaten by those beetles from 'Supernatural,' I'd have to flip a coin.

Friday, November 18 - The new Harry Potter movie opens this weekend, the one where they pick his name out of the "Goblet of Fire" to do an impossible task. I don't want to give away the ending, but apparently all charges against Saddam are dropped, and the two of them fly away on Harry's magical broom.

Saturday, November 19 - O.J. Simpson says Robert Blake was a victim of injustice. Now. O.J., let's go over it one more time: Traditionally in murder cases, we reserve the term 'victim' for the dead person. There are so many punchlines here, I don't know where to begin. Too bad they're all stored behind my box of Super Nintendo cartridges in a box marked '1995.'

Sunday, November 20 - The Edmonton Eskimos teach the world a valuable lesson in cooperation and brotherhood as quarterbacks Ricky Ray and Jason Maas work together to send the Esks to the Grey Cup. If Shaq and Kobe could have done the same, the Lakers would have two more NBA titles right now.

Monday, November 21 - A woman I know on the new Parti Quebecois leader Andre Boisclair: "He looks like the bus driver for the 120 to Jasper Place. At least now I understand why the two front seats of the 7:18 are designated as 'distinct society seating.'
Tuesday, November 22 - Other Canadian celebrity lookalikes: Jason Maas...and the devil. I'm not kidding. Maybe Sean Fleming's mysterious kicking improvement over the course of the season isn't such a mystery after all.

Wednesday, November 23 - Prince Albert II ascends the throne of Monaco. Heh-heh. Prince Albert. Some days these jokes write themselves.

Thursday, November 24 – Ralph Klein is giving money away? Has he been replaced by aliens or is he just jealous that Prince Albert of Monaco has a funnier nickname than King Ralph?.

Friday, November 25 - The honeymoon is over at Edmonton Eskimos practices. Some rascal put a 'Kick Me' sign on Ricky Ray's back..and Sean Fleming put him through the uprights from forty-six yards out. Reportedly, Jason Maas laughed so hard flies came out of his mouth, but he disappeared in a flash of brimstone before reporters could get comments.

Saturday, November 26 - November 26 is Buy Nothing Day, where we refuse to indulge in our consumer culture by not spending any money, or I like to call it--Date Night.

Sunday, November 27 - The Edmonton Eskimos win the 2005 Grey Cup in overtime, capping one of the most physically gruelling seasons ever. I think I pulled a hamstring with all that jumping on and off the bandwagon.

Monday, November 28 - After the Liberals lose a non-confidence motion, the stage is set for an January vote, despite worries that "Canadians don't want another election." Yes, because Canadians have always been against democracy. Hockey games aren't decided by votes; they're decided by shoot-outs. Why should government be any different?

Tuesday, November 29 – Looks like the Black Eyed Peas have a new member—Edmonton Eskimos coach Danny Maciocia. Said Peas member Fergie: “We wanted someone with a similar dance style.”

Wednesday, November 30 - Fans everywhere are distraught over the break-up of Jessica Simpson and Nick What's-his-name. I haven't seen people this upset over a break-up since Conservative backbenchers had to retire their 'I Heart Peter and Belinda' t-shirts.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005


Upcoming Comedy
Wednesday, November 30 - Yuk Yuks (guest spot)
Sunday, December 11 - The Comic Strip (guest spot)
Sunday, December 18 - The Comic Strip (guest spot)
Thursday, January 5 - Yuk Yuks (middle)

-shot the photo art for my next three articles on Monday. I think we got some good stuff, especially for the Christmas shopping article on December 16th.

-My Saturday show went extremely well. Shallow person that I am, I measure a show by how many hugs I get from pretty female audience was a Very Good Show. I'll be back at Yuks on Wednesday developing some new material--but don't let that stop you from coming. JOHN WING will be there, and since he doesn't come through a lot, he's worth checking out. He's a great writer and performer and I love watching. HOWIE MILLER will be MCing which is always a good time.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Usually I use this space to shamelessly plug my writing and comedy. I'm a private person and I like to keep my personal life to myself. Having said that, one of the toughest challenges I face is the fact that my writing and comedy often forces me to dig into my insecurities and fears. Somebody once said 'happiness isn't funny.' I know for myself, my most succesful articles and jokes work because I'm letting myself be vulnerable.

Comedians, writers and show business personalities have a reputation as being troubled souls. Looking at the list of famous creative people who have struggled with depression or bipolar disorder, I guess there's some truth to that. And when you're constantly making yourself the butt of the joke, it's easy to let yourself start believing in those negative feelings that come up.

That's why those people who can keep a positive attitude are so awesome. Comics like LARS CALLIEOU and KERRY UNGER are two of my favorites for this. They recognize the place comedy has in their life, and while they love it, they also leave room for the other things that matter to them and refuse to let themselves dwell in negativity.

But here's something interesting:

For myself, I'm finding it largely a matter of attitude. One thing writing about my vulnerabilities has taught me, is that it's okay to be afraid or anxious or less-than-cool. I'm learning to accept the not-so-great parts of my personality, and weirdly enough, that makes me feel pretty good.

I like being positive. I try to make a conscious effort to focus on the good things in my life and the directions that I'm excited about exploring. But instead of trying to ignore the negative things in my life or pretend they aren't there, I'm learning to use them in a positive way--namely, making Mrs. Brodribb's handsome son rich and famous. Or at least moderately well-off and vaguely recognizable.

I've got a show tonight to get ready for. Hope to see you there (I knew I could get a plug in, if I just tried).


Friday, November 18, 2005

Weekend Edition

Upcoming Comedy
Saturday, November 26 - Yuk Yuks (20-min. Middle) EARLY SHOW ONLY

Upcoming Edmonton Journal Living articles
Friday, December 2 - First Date
Friday, December 16 - Christmas Shopping
Friday, December 30 -New Year's

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine supplement.

-I've just been booked in a middle spot for the Early show on Saturday, November 26 at Yuk Yuks. I'll be doing a twenty minute set, which is longer than my usual appearances. Yuks' website doesn't say the name of the headliner, but I'm sure he's very good--after all, he's following Me. Hope to see everyone there.

-I'm coming off a stretch of eight comedy appearances in eleven days and I've hit the highest of the highs and the lowest of lows in that time. Fortunately, I have a great group of fellow comics to write, rehearse, and share the victories and setbacks with.

-When I haven't been performing, I've been sitting at home writing on my upcoming articles as well as an outline for a teleplay and the usual short stories. It doesn't make for exciting blog updates, but I'm pretty happy with the way things are coming along.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

October headLINES (better late than never)

Saturday, October 1 - The American Association of Sunday and Feature Editors recognized the Journal's ed magazine for fearlessness and innovation. Like the time we put the Miss Grand Prix girls on the cover of ed. Bet the competition wishes they thought of that.

Sunday, October 2 - The Edmonton Oilers want to replace Rexall/Skyreach/Northlands Coliseum/Place/Centre with a new rink. I guess they're tired of renaming the old one.

Monday, October 3 - CBC employees are going back to work, which means we'll see Don Cherry on TV this year after all. In preparation for his return, men's fashion experts have already begun clawing out their own eyes.

Tuesday, October 4 - ed Top 10 writer Lars Callieou and I had a great time working on ed's bar special this week. The best part was trying to beat cover charges all over the city under the guise of research. "Fearlessness and Innovation" are our middle names.

Wednesday, October 5 - Lars and I thought we had it made being sent to work on the strip club section of the bar guide, until Lars realized: "Hey that's a MALE stripper. I bet he isn't a real cop either."

COMMENTARY: This story never actually happened. Lars and I wanted to be very clear on that.

Thursday, October 6 - Turns out he was a real cop. He just needed a night job after withdrawing his candidacy for police chief.

Friday, October 7 - American citizens are complaining about President Bush's decision to appoint Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court in spite of her complete lack of qualifications. Weren't American citizens the ones who voted both Jesse Ventura and Arnold Schwarzenegger into political office? They're just prejudiced against Miers because she never appeared in 'The Running Man.'

COMMENTARY: They were also in Predator together. For the record.

Saturday, October 8 - Oiler Ryan Smyth is out of the line-up after Jason Maas took out his knee with a crowbar, yelling "Somehow, some way, I'm going to play somewhere this season!" I guess it worked; he's already signed to fight Tonya Harding in a foxy boxing match.

Sunday, October 9 - The Green Bay Packers win their first game of the NFL season by a margin of nearly fifty points. In other news, the sun rises in the West, Elvis returned to deliver a message of peace and hope from the back of a winged giraffe, and Tom Cruise admitted there might be something to this psychiatry business after all.

Monday, October 10 - Telus and its union are close to a settlement, which means we can expect Telus to "resume it's previous level of service." In that case, maybe I should smash my phone with a hammer now and save myself the aggravation.

Tuesday, October 11 - Season 2 of Arrested Development on DVD, leftover turkey, and
unused sick time...Looks like I'm going to be thankful just a little bit longer.

Wednesday, October 12 - Why do they put Halloween candy on sale six weeks before Halloween? My grocery store receipts are starting to look like David Dingwall's expense account. We aren't even halfway through the month, and I've already gained fifteen pounds and an extra chin.

Thursday, October 13 - PM Paul Martin vows to get tough with the U.S. about the softwood lumber dispute. If the Americans don't shape up, he's going to write a sternly-worded anonymous one-liner to Venting.

Friday, October 14 - Just-In-Case-You-Were-Thinking-of-Trying-It...Don't Dept. The Halloween Candy and Leftover Thanksgiving Turkey Diet. It tastes pretty good, but after four days, I was feeling a little queasy. Too bad I used all my sick time.

Saturday, October 15 - Rob and Amber, two reality show stars who gained fame on Survivor are in town, which is fitting since watching the competition for a new police chief is like watching a bizarro-world version of Survivor where the contestants are TRYING to get voted off the island.

Sunday, October 16 - Memo to Michael Flatley: Wearing a ridiculous Masters of the Universe costume and being joined on stage by girls in bikinis does not make you a Celtic Tiger, no matter how much you look like Larry Bird. Not that I was there or anything.

Monday, October 17 - Prince Harry is training at the Royal Military Academy. It will help him with his royal duties in the event he's challenged to single combat by the leader of another nation...or in case Daniel Craig doesn't work out as the new James Bond.

Tuesday, October 18 - A surveyor's error means the Alberta/Saskatchewan border may be wrong. Does this mean we have to split our prosperity cheques with the people of Lloydminster? Because $399.97 doesn't go nearly as far.

Wednesday, October 19 - You know you're getting desperate for a Halloween costume when you start looking at the guy dressed as Sailor Moon from a past issue of ed and think, "You know, I think I could pull that off."

Thursday, October 20 - I picked up a new book called "In Praise of Slow," about reducing the pace of modern life, but I haven't yet had time to read it. Maybe I'll get an audio version so I can fast-forward through the boring parts.

Friday, October 21 - Prince Harry defeats Prince Nana from Ghana in gladiator combat. Meanwhile Paul Martin and George W. Bush are all set to settle their softwood differences over a spirited game of Connect Four. That does it--North America is officially WussyLand.

COMMENTARY: Prince Nana is a real character, though he's not a real prince. He's Jimmy Rave's manager in Ring of Honor wrestling. Aren't you glad I do my research?

Saturday, October 22 - Alice Cooper performed at the Winspear of all places. Take note, up and coming artists, he might be old, but the guy's been cutting off his own head at shows for over thirty years. Now that's commitment.

Sunday, October 23 - Solicitor General Harvey Cenaiko is in hot water for trying to ban coffee and other caffeinated products from Alberta prisons. He's braver than me. Law-abiding citizens going though caffeine withdrawal are scary enough, let alone someone who can turn a toothbrush into a murder weapon.

Monday, October 24 - Tragedy struck at the Monday night open stage at the Sidetrack Cafe when local singer/songwriter Ben Spencer was hospitalized for blood loss after cutting off his own head. Apparently, it isn't as easy as Alice Cooper makes it look.

Tuesday, October 25 - In an NHL special treat, the Edmonton Oilers' opponents tonight will be...the Colorado Avalanche. Again. Since their latest expansion, the NHL has, like, 948 teams. Can't we play one of them for a change? It would be nice to lose to someone different, that's all.

Wednesday, October 26 - Saddam Hussein's trial has been delayed again, after he had a scuffle with his guards. Maybe they let him have too much coffee.

Thursday, October 27 - A pair of Montreal parents are suing a teacher for being verbally abusive to their child. Preposterous. Verbal abuse is good for kids. Professor Snape was sarcastic and condescending too, yet that Harry Potter kid turned out okay.

Friday, October 28 - Katie Holmes is pregnant. I wonder who the father is. Oh, come on. I can't be the only one thinking it.

Saturday, October 29 - The good news: Sean Fleming kicked five field goals in the Edmonton Eskimos victory over B.C. in CFL action. The Bad News: I have to pick another local sports figure to mercilessly abuse. How does everybody feel about Raffi Torres?

Sunday, October 30 - 10 years ago today, in a close referendum, the people of Quebec voted to remain a part of Canada. Well, except for the Nordiques.

Monday, October 31 - For a special Halloween treat, ed writer Dan Brodribb appears on the Adler on Line radio show talking as an expert on women relationships. I will now pause so my ex-girlfriend can wipe the tears of laughter from her eyes and seek medical treatment for the burns suffered from spraying hot coffee out her nose.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

You're a Rock Star...and your friend was pretty good too

Upcoming Comedy
Thursday, November 10 - The Roost (AIDS benefit)
Saturday, November 12 - Yuk Yuks (LATE SHOW ONLY)
Sunday, November 13 - The Comic Strip

Upcoming Edmonton Journal Living articles
Friday, November 18
Friday, December 2
Friday, December 16
Friday, December 30

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine supplement.

-Every once and a while in comedy, you do a show where everything goes right and you get to play Rock Star for a little while. I'm not one to toot my own horn (actually, I am, but in this case, TODD K. already did it for me. Check out the November 9 entry at for all the details. While you're there, check out his schedule and see when he's doing a show in your area next). I think I understand why comedians sell CDs after shows now. It isn't so much the money as you have an excuse to stand by the door as people are leaving so you can grub for compliments.

In his entry Todd talks about the "you were pretty good too" phenomenon, which has probably happened to everyone in showbiz at some point. It's when you're standing next to someone who did a fantastic job (Usually LARS, ANDREW IWANYK, or--more and more often it seems--KATHLEEN MCGEE) and people are coming telling them how great they are and then they kind of notice you and as an afterthought say, "Oh, yeah. you were pretty good too." I wonder if there's a column in this somewhere.

-headLINES will be posted shortly.

Monday, November 07, 2005


Upcoming events:
Comedy: October 13 - The Comic Strip

Writing in the Edmonton Journal's living section
Friday, November 18: Lucky Me
Friday, December 2 - First Dates
Friday, December 16 - Christmas Shopping
Friday, December 30 - New Year's is up and running. I just need to make sure I know how to update the sucker. It's not as fancy as some out there, but it gets the information I want out there in a clear and easy to find way, so I'm really happy with it. Thanks TAMMI for all your help.

-My radio interview ended up going last Thursday. If you missed it, I was brilliant.

-Found out I'll be writing a couple more articles for Christmas and New Year's in the Journal. Check out the Upcoming events for the dates.

-I've been having some great sets lately at Yuks and the Comic Strip. I don't always get the dates up here in a timely fashion, because a lot of them are 'surprise guest' spots, but one thing I love is how great the crowds are in this city. You guys make the shows happen.

-Caught the MPW show on Saturday. I always love watching the bad guys--it's cool seeing guys like SHANE O'RYAN and ACE DAVIDSON taking those extra steps to make the crowd hate them or to make the 'good guy wrestler (that's babyface for all you internet fans) look good. If you get a chance to see them, show your appreciation by booing them unmercifully. Trust me--they like it. I should have a commentary up at their site in the next week or so.


Upcoming events:
Comedy: October 13 - The Comic Strip

Writing in the Edmonton Journal's living section
Friday, November 18: Lucky Me
Friday, December 2 - First Dates
Friday, December 16 - Christmas Shopping
Friday, December 30 - New Year's is up and running. I just need to make sure I know how to update the sucker. It's not as fancy as some out there, but it gets the information I want out there in a clear and easy to find way, so I'm really happy with it. Thanks TAMMI for all your help.

-My radio interview ended up going last Thursday. If you missed it, I was brilliant.

-Found out I'll be writing a couple more articles for Christmas and New Year's in the Journal. Check out the Upcoming events for the dates.

-I've been having some great sets lately at Yuks and the Comic Strip. I don't always get the dates up here in a timely fashion, because a lot of them are 'surprise guest' spots, but one thing I love is how great the crowds are in this city. You guys make the shows happen.

-Caught the MPW show on Saturday. I always love watching the bad guys--it's cool seeing guys like SHANE O'RYAN and ACE DAVIDSON taking those extra steps to make the crowd hate them or to make the 'good guy wrestler (that's babyface for all you internet fans) look good. If you get a chance to see them, show your appreciation by booing them unmercifully. Trust me--they like it.

Monday, October 31, 2005


-My radio interview has been rescheduled for tomorrow at 2:30. Sorry for those of you who booked time off work to listen to my pearls of wisdom--apparently the Radio Powers that Be think the actual "News" takes precedence over my Confucious-like brilliance. They better put me up tomorrow and not just be using the Brodribb Hype Machine for their own ends.

Adler on Line is heard, Monday through Friday
2 p.m. to 6 p.m. (ET)
Check local listings for broadcast times
in your area:
680 CJOB Winnipeg AM 640 Toronto Radio 940 Montreal
900 CHML Hamilton 980 CFPL London
630 CHED Edmonton 770 CHQR Calgary
980 CKNW Vancouver
980 CJME Regina 650 CKOM Saskatoon

The good news is, having to re-schedule means, I can correct the dates for my Upcoming Comedy Shows (I think I've been putting up the wrong month).

They are:
Upcoming Comedy Dates:
Thursday, October 3 - Yuk Yuks

Sunday, November 13 - The Comic Strip

Current and Upcoming writing
NEW! 'Tyrannosaurus Al appears in this Fall's Storyteller Magazine. Order online at
Friday, November 18 - Edmonton Journal Living section
'Glass Houses' in the anthology 'Cold Flesh,' available through
Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed supplement

Saturday, October 29, 2005

World's Fastest Update

Upcoming Comedy
The Comic Strip - Sunday, November 13

Radio Appearance
Monday, October 21 at 2:30pm on Adler on Line.

-I guess people have been reading my articles, since I've been invited to appear on Adler on Line today (Monday) at 2:30pm to talk about weddings, friends, and relationships. That doesn't leave me much time to set the wheels of the Mighty Brodribb Hype Machine (Basically, this blog and an out-of-date e-mail list), in motion, but if you want to check it out, the info on the station that runs Adler on Line in your market can be found at (I'm told it's 630 Ched in Edmonton, since most of the people reading this are from there). I'd post more about how excited I am and more information on where you can hear it, but I'm too busy trying to figure out what the heck I'm going to say.

-I also got an unexpected set at THE COMIC STRIP last night, which was awesome, because I wasn't expecting any shows this week. It was a great crowd and everyone on the show did really well. The headliner TOM RHODES just became one of my new favorites. Keep an eye out for him, as he doesn't make too many trips up to Canada.

-Geez. And to think I thought this was going to be a slow week.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Tuesday Update

-Thanks to my friend TAMMI LEE at Storm's Eye, my website should be up and running pretty soon. It won't be as fancy as some out there, but I'm not a very fancy person; all I need is a place to brag about my accomplishments, and I'm happy. Speaking of which...

-I got my contributor's copy of the Fall 2005 issue of Storyteller featuring my story "Tyrannosaurus Al" along with a number of other great stories by Canadian authors too numerous to name. I don't see the issue at their website at, but contact them about availability. I'm told that Storyteller is moving to subscription only, so you won't be able to pick this one up on news-stands.

-More stuff is up in the Inside MPW section of under my various aliases. See if you can figure out which ones are me.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

September headLINES & Updates.

Tuesday, October 12 - Yuk Yuks
Sunday, October 16 - The Comic Strip

-Friday, October 14 - The Edmonton Journal's Living Section
-Friday, October 28 - The Edmonton Journal's Living Section

-My website is nearly finished. I'm very excited. If I were a bell, I'd ring.

-I went in today to shoot the artwork for my next couple of Journal articles. Everyone at the Journal did a great job. I look like a total fool--which pleases me, because looking like a total fool is what pays my rent. I can't wait to see them when my articles come out this Friday and Friday, October 28

Enjoy September's headLINES:

Thursday, September 1 - Two more months until the start of the NBA regular season. So far my Utah Jazz are undefeated at 0-0. I have a feeling this will be the happiest I'll be all year.

Friday, September 2 - Edmonton Hemp Fest Day kicks into full swing. Hemp is a very useful material that can be used to make many things like rope and clothes...and oh come on, who are these people trying to kid? When was the last time you heard of anyone celebrating Hemp Fest with a tug-of-war?

Saturday, September 3 - At the tattoo festival this weekend I got a tattoo on my face...of Brad Pitt's face. Maybe I'll have better luck with women now that I'm telling them I'm 'in town working on a movie.'

Sunday, September 4 - Local singer/songwriter Vic de Sousa does a gig as an Elvis impersonator at West Edmonton Mall. Judging from the number of screaming women, I got the wrong tattoo.

Monday, September 5 - Retired seven time Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong and singer Sheryl Crow are engaged. Do you think we'll see them around town on a bicycle built for two?

Tuesday, September 6 - Hey, everybody! Fraggle Rock is out on DVD! I am not happy about this. The show was cancelled in 1987 and it took me another twelve years to get that stupid theme song out of my head. Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.

Wednesday, September 7 - University starts today. I love U of A in September. The clean-smelling air, the golden leaves--and the first-years are still dressing up for classes. Take a good look. In three weeks, it'll be scrunchies, sweatpants, and Golden Bear hoodies like everyone else.

Thursday, September 8 - CN claims they have an 'above average' record when it comes to avoiding oil spills. There you go--a C+. What are you tree-huggers complaining about?

Friday, September 9 - This month Cosomopolitan magazine celebrates 40 years with its finger on the pulse of modern womanhood. This month's article: 50 Ways to be a Better Girlfriend. You've come a long way, baby.

Saturday, September 10 - Todd Babiak might be able to write novels about city landmarks, but can he make amusing signs to hold up for the cameras at Monster Pro Wrestling events? I don't like to brag, but I think it's clear who the real artist is.

Sunday, September 11 - Outrageous gas prices are causing a lot of controversy these days. One guy almost died when he saw the price of a tank of unleaded. It was one of those environmentalist flakes--he was laughing so hard, he nearly fell off his ten-speed.

Monday, September 12 - Circle your calendars and sharpen your cutlasses, me hearties. There's just seven days left til Sepember 19--Talk Like A Pirate Day. Check out for examples of how far a combination of 'enterprenerial spirit' and 'way too much time on one's hands' can take you. Aye, 'tis a heady grog.

Tuesday, September 13 - "You can DANCE...You can JIIIVVVE...Having the time of your Life!" What kind of sadist's idea was it to write a musical about ABBA? I saw Mamma Mia! on the weekend, and now I can't get 'Dancing Queen' out of my head. Did I say cutlasses earlier? I need a lobotomy knife.

Wednesday, September 14 - The Edmonton Police Commission is having a hard time finding candidates to interview for the job of police chief. They should interview me. To catch a crook, you have to be able to think like a crook...and I've played a lot of Grand Theft Auto on PlayStation.

Thursday, September 15 - Kicking-a-Man-When-He's-Down-Department: Edmonton Eskimos kicker Sean Fleming is frustrated about the missed field goals that have landed him on the bench in recent weeks. He says he could just kick himself...of course he'd probably miss.

Friday, September 16 - I don't blame Fleming. He's just been unlucky. He's been so unlucky members of the Edmonton Police Commission have been phoning him saying, "Boy, you've sure been jinxed lately."

Saturday, September 17 - The new designs for the Edmonton Art Gallery are pretty good, but if they want to make it great, they should have it designed by the same guy who did the city of Minas Tirith in the third Lord of the Rings movie. Just thinking out loud here.

Sunday, September 18 - William Shatner wins an Emmy for his acting? Is there an apocalypse going on no one told me about?

Monday, September 19 - Ex-PM Brian Mulroney his been scandalized by some off-color comments he made to a person he thought was a friend, only to find out they taped the conversations and used them for personal gain. Weird--I thought Linda Tripp's 15 minutes of fame was up six years ago.

Tuesday, September 20 - System of a Down has great music, but just because they sing about poor people going to war, it doesn’t make them the “most relevant band in the world.” It just makes them an Armenian-American Creedence Clearwater Revival. Not that that’s a bad thing.

Wednesday, September 21 – Now that Mark Messier is retired, maybe he’d accept a job as Edmonton’s police chief. We know he’s tough, and at least he’d have an excuse to get into hockey games for free.

Thursday, September 22 - Local comedian Andrew Iwanyk's Thursday night talent search at Picard's Coffeehouse by Grant MacEwan to discover the 'funniest person on campus' has turned into a quest to discover 'funniest person on campus not at home watching 'The O.C.' Clearly the government needs to start spending more on education--those poor students can't even afford TiVo.

Friday, September 23 - My comedy set at Andrew Iwanyk's Thursday night talent search was ruined by a heckler who just wouldn't stop yelling at me. He was profane, he was abusive, he was arrogant...why didn't anyone tell my Brian Mulroney was in town?

Saturday, September 24 - I think all our streets should be named after former Oilers, just because giving directions would be so much fun. "Take Coffey over to Gretzky and then to Kurri. That should get you to Winner's. Avoid Semenko--it's really slow, and if you find yourself on Steve Smith then you're going the wrong way."

Sunday, September 25 - Ashton Kucher marries a much-older Demi Moore. Moore's kids from her previous marriage refer to him as My Other Dad--which is weird, since they were home babysitting him at the time.

Monday, September 26 - Umm...Happy Birthday, Olivia Newton-John? So sue me--it's a slow news day.

Tuesday, September 27 - Thanks to oil revenue surpluses, the provincial government will be reimbursing us $400 or half a tank of gas, whichever is cheaper.

Wednesday, September 28 - Recently Jennifer Aniston told Oprah Brad Pitt no longer occupies her every waking thought. See, Edmonton? If she can move on, so can we.

Thursday, September 29 - Not every Edmontonian is obsessed with Pitt though. Some are obssessed with hockey. When they heard there was a movie called Mr. and Mrs. Smith they wondered if it was about Jason or a misspelling of Ryan.

Friday, September 30 - Albertans are complaining about the government's method of distributing the $400--namely, hiding it at the end of the Lacombe Corn Maze. When asked what he had to say to citizens thrashing through poorly lit, unlabeled, and overgrown trails to get to where they were going a senior infrastructure official shrugged and said: "Get used to it."

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Zen and the Art of Sales

Upcoming dates
Wednesday, October 5 - Yuk Yuks (guest spot)
Sunday, October 16 The Comic Strip (guest spot)

-It looks like I'll be celebrating the anniversary of my first year in comedy on the same stage I started on--a five minute guest spot at Yuk Yuks. What a year it's been. When I think of what I've learned, the people I've met, and the new opportunities I've enjoyed, I can say without exaggeration that comedy has changed my life. Thanks go out to STEVE MCCARTHY who got me started on this adventure as well as the other comedians and club staff who have gone out of their way to help me develop.

-I also have to give a thank you to LARS CALLIEOU, who offered to put me up at The Comic Strip on the 5th if I didn't get a spot at Yuks, despite me not being on the schedule. It was something he didn't have to do, and I appreciate the gesture. He's also a very funny guy, and while I'm told he'll be reducing the amount of Edmonton shows he's doing for the next couple of months to avoid overplaying the market, if you're in the Edmonton area and you want to see him, your best bet is to call The Comic Strip and ask when his next show is.

-Random Ramble: LARS CALLIEOU, KELLY SOLODUKA, ANDREW IWANYK, POWERMANN, and I were sitting around at the Sidetrack on Monday, when Andrew pretended to answer Lars' phone and proceeded to have a five-minute imaginary phone call (Doing these sort of thing is one of Andrew's favorite past-times. When Yuk Yuks mis-spelled my name on their marquee, he spent nearly five minutes insisting that their's was the correct spelling and that I had been mis-spelling my name my whole life). In writing that doesn't look like much, but what was funny about the whole situation is how Andrew tried to convince us the call was real even though it clearly wasn't.

This made me think two things. Thing one was to keep Iwanyk away from my cell phone.
Thing two is about something called Selling.

I have no definition for the word selling which is weird, because it's probably the single-most important skill any performer can learn. Selling is the point where the performance meets the crowd, where you do what you do with such conviction, that they get swept up in the moment and forget that they're watching a show. People aren't stupid: they know many of the comedian's 'spontaneous comments' are usually carefully rehearsed and the fortune-teller can't really read minds and the stripper isn't going home with them at the end of the night no matter how much money they throw at her. But a good Sell creates that moment of doubt which allows people to leave reality behind and enter into the world you're trying to show them--and that's what makes the performance not the jokes you tell, or the moves you do.

I was going somewhere with this, but I forgot. I think it was--if you're a performer and you want to be succesful, before you do anything else, learn to Sell.

headLINES for September should be posted shortly.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

New Columns

Dates for new Living columns
(all in the Edmonton Journa)
Friday, Oct 14
Friday, Oct 28
Friday, Nov 18

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine supplement

-I'll be celebrating my one-year anniversary of doing stand-up comedy on October 5. I've been begging to get onstage at Yuks to commemmorate the happy event, but we'll see what happens.

-I've been writing like crazy these days. Exciting for me, but not the stuff thrilling blog entries are made of

-Spent Monday evening with NICK ROY, LARS CALLIEOU, SEAN LECOMBRE, and ANDREW IWANYK. Great comics all, and each has their own distinctive style. Nick's planning to make the move to Vancouver, so I hope the left coast is ready for him.

-I spent last night in the company of some good friends who are not involved in writing or comedy. You need those people to keep you grounded. I've been blessed with a wonderful family and an abundance of awesome people in my life, so no matter what my future holds, I consider myself a very succesful man.

-MPW has a show this Saturday, which means somehow another month has slipped by. Amazing how fast life happens sometimes. If you see me, come say hi. I'll be in the front row with my 'Captain Charisma' t-shirt and notepad.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005


Upcoming Comedy
Yuk Yuks-September 21
Yuk Yuks-Sepember 24
The Comic Strip-September 25
The Comic Strip-October 16

-I've written a couple other articles for the MPW site under various noms-de-plume (Art McNeil, Dan Brodribb, "Devil" Ray Gagne) in the 'Inside MPW' section of It's a different style of writing for me, and I love any opportunity to try something different and new.

-I could have learned a lesson from some of those wrestlers last week. One of the first and most basic business lessons young wrestlers are taught is that even if you show up to an event you aren't scheduled to work, bring your gear anyway, because there's always a chance that injuries or cancellations will result in an opportunity to get on the show. Last Tuesday, PAUL SVEEN offered me a five-minute guest spot on the Stan Thomson Benefit Show. I went up underdressed and underprepared, and though I had a decent set, it certainly wasn't the kind of impression I wanted to make in front of a crowd, not to mention a 'jury of my peers' that included some of the best and most succesful names in the local scene: PAUL MYREHAUG, PAUL SVEEN, WINSTON HERBERT, KERRY UNGER, SEAN LECOMBRE, ANDREW GROSE, and HOWIE MILLER. All in all though, it was a great show for a great cause, and showcased the best sides of the local comedy scene, not just as performers, but as people.

-ANDEW IWANYK has opened a 'alternative-comedy night' Thursday nights at Picard's Coffee House and Pub across from the downtown Grant MacEwan campus. Each week
he'll be hosting a funniest person on campus contest, so come on down and join the fun or cheer on your favorites. Last week I slipped past a Field of Champions featuring KATHLEEN MCGEE, NICK ROY, LARS CALLIEOU, and BRIAN HEGGE, only to be defeated in the finals--which was decided in a game of Tic-Tac-Toe--by KEVIN (don't know his last name) due to an act of treachery so heinous, the written word doesn't do it justice. Kevin is now the proud champion and is the current holder of the LUIGI statue (come down to Picard's and see it), but after coming so close, I'm determined to come back this week and take home the championship. Remember Kevin: You can run, but you can't hide, and the next time I walk in to Picard's Coffee House and Pub, I'm walking out the champion. Okay, now I know I've been spending to much time watching Monster Pro Wrestling.

-Got together with a bunch of comics this week for a writing group. TODD K organizes the group (ironically enough, he actually missed this week as he's quite busy with shows--check to see what he's up to), and it's great, if only because writing can be such a lonely business sometimes, it can be great to share tips and ideas with others who share the same passion. It's also great to get a 'sneak preview' of what other comics are working on. I won't spoil any surprises, but I will say this: SHAWN GRAMIAK and KATHRYN WHEATON have some very funny new bits. Check them out if you get a chance.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

September 13 Updates

Saturday, September 24 - Yuk Yuks (guest spot, 8:00pm show)
Sunday, September 25 - The Comic Strip (unpaid guest spot)

-Confessions of the Hugging Impaired- Friday, September 16 in the Life Section of the Edmonton Journal
-Dan Brodribb's short story 'Tyrannosaurus Al' will be appearing in the Fall issue of Storyteller Magazine (
-Another short story, "Glass Houses" is available in the anthology 'Cold Flesh' which you can pick up at or visit the 'Cold Flesh' website at
-Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine

-I've got an article in the Edmonton Journal this Friday on being hugging-impaired (If you don't know me, this may mean nothing to you, but to anyone who knows me, this should make perfect sense.There's some pictures with the article and due to an illness the person playing my sister in the articles is in fact--my sister. Although I write about my family a lot, I usually like to respect their privacy as much as possible as far as keeping them out of the public eye by not using their names or printing pictures of them. This Friday will mark an exception to that rule...collector's take note--this could be your only chance to see an actual member of my family in a an article.

-Yuk Yuks is celebrating their 20th anniversary next week. MIKE MCDONALD will be headlining. I've been given a guest spot on the Saturday 8:00pm show, and I'm thrilled to be sharing the stage with a legend in Canadian comedy. (Note: Due to a change in the way Yuk Yuks is scheduling guest spots, I might be able to post a lot of the dates for my guest appearances more than a day or two in advance. Of course, that might change if my legions of loyal fans start phoning the Yuks offices at 481-9857 (481-YUKS) and demanding to know the next appearance of Mrs. Brodribb's handsome first-born son. Not that I'm recommending it or anything. In the words of SEAN LECOMBRE: "That would be gauche.")

-'Tyrannosaurus Al' will be appearing in the Fall issue of Storyteller ( Keep an eye on this space or check out their website for details.

-SHORT NOTICE DEPARTMENT: There's a benefit happening at the Edmonton Yuk Yuks for comedian STAN THOMSON, who was stabbed out east in Ontario. I don't know Stan, but I do know that for five dollars, you can see some of the best pro comics in Western Canada including as well as give money to a good cause. There will be another benefit on September 28 for the victims of hurricane Katrina, also featuring some of Yuks finest. For details on both these events take a look at the Yuk Yuks website at

Thursday, September 08, 2005

August headLINES & updates

-Congratulations to KERRY UNGER, whose Comedy Now! special aired last week. I would have plugged it here, but I didn't know it was happening. However, Kerry will be appearing at the Edmonton Yuk Yuks from September 15 to 17th. As far as local talent goes, Kerry has been the biggest influence on the way I do stand-up whose initials aren't A.I. (For the record, that would be ANGIE ISMOND and ANDREW IWANYK)

-I've got a couple more upcoming humor articles in the Journal. I'm doing a photo shoot for one next week, so it could see print as soon as next Friday.

-Storyteller Magazine is looking to pick up a short story I wrote called 'Tyrannosaurus Al.' I'm doing some edits right now, and I'll post on the blog information as it develops.

Without further ado, on to August's headLINES

Monday, August 1 - We are fighting the Danish, right? Or is it the Dutch? Either way, it'll be a war for the ages. It's a good thing it's a long weekend.

Tuesday, August 2 - It's Motley Crue...Again. First they wouldn't come here at all, now they won't leave.

Wednesday, August 3 - VEHICLE FOR SALE: Space shuttle, 1984, white. Fair condition. 158 859 429 km. Call 555-NASA.

Thursday, August 4 - Folkfest begins, and as much as I'd love to see Alpha Blondy & the Solar System just on their name alone, what I really want to do is be among people who thought it was cool when Max Sterling dressed his giant robot in a Zentraedi uniform. Hence, I'll be spending the weekend at...

Friday, August 5 - ...Animethon 12, featuring the best in Japanese anime. It's the only one of our many festivals where you can get together with friends and talk about how Neon Genesis Evangelion will never measure up to Astroboy and then get shot down trying to pick up girls dressed like Sailor Moon.

Saturday, August 6 - There's nothing like sitting in a downpour watching Ruthie Foster sing "Another Rain Song" while trying to use the power of your mind to will the patch of blue sky on the horizon to float over to Gallagher Hill. I love this city. Where else can you be so miserable and so happy at the same time.

Sunday, August 7 - Also overheard at the Folk Fest: "Boy, this hill is tippy." aren't on the hill, sport. Maybe you should spend more time listening to the music, and less money at the beer tent.

Monday, August 8 - Special thanks to the ed reader who after reading that I found Sailor Moon costumes sexy sent in some pictures from Animethon. I said GIRLS in Sailor Moon costumes, damn it. Now, hand me that oven brush--I'm off to scrub my eyeballs.

Tuesday, August 9 - As small-market teams continue to sign big-name free agents, it becomes clear the players have taken a pretty big pay cut in the new NHL collective bargaining agreement. Games will now end with the PA announcer reminding fans to "please remember to tip your goalie."

Wednesday, August 10 - Oil and gas prices take another jump. It's gotten so bad, the other day I saw a bunch of guys heading out to Lake Wabamun with jerry cans.

Thursday, August 11 - Scientists have discovered a 10th planet, a desolate waste of rock and ice in a freezing, empty void. Defense Minister Bill Graham is already on his way to claim it for Canada

Friday, August 12 - Hey, everybody, it's Ben Affleck's birthday today. For those of you who care, let's give him a real treat: Let's pretend Gigli never happened.

Saturday, August 13 - U.S. fighters accidentally bomb Australia. Accidentally? How do you make that kind of mistake? Australia is its own continent, for crying out loud. There's a Crocodile Hunter joke crying to be made here, but I'm too disgusted to bother.

Sunday, August 14 - More violence in the city as a wedding reception ends with three stabbings and a hit-and-run. All things considered, though, things could have been a lot worse. At least they waited to start the bloodbath until after the pictures were taken.

Monday, August 15 - There's a new device for cell phones now, called the Jerk-O-Meter that tells you if you're being annoying during your conversations. What's the point? If you're so antisocial you need a machine to tell you that you're being a creep, you probably aren't spending that much time on the phone.

Tuesday, August 16 - Bertuzzi's been reinstated in the NHL following a suspension for attacking another player from behind. No news whether other players will be adding rear-view mirrors to their equipment or just putting little stop signs on the back of their jerseys like the kids in minor hockey.

Wednesday, August 17 - I've used up all my cell phone minutes pestering Journal personality-cum-actor Olivia Cheng on the set of her new mini-series trying to convince her to get me Dwight Yoakam's autograph. And guess what? I set a new high score on my Jerk-O-Meter.

Thursday, August 18 - Since thanks to the U.S., Australia is now a bombed-out wasteland (There's a Mad Max joke crying out to be made here, but I'm too disgusted to bother), the Crocodile Hunter will now be filmed in Afghanistan--"Crikey! Take a look at this little beauty! It's Osama bin-Laden!)

Friday, August 19 - Speaking of Mad Max, with gas prices hitting 9 837 dollars a barrel, is anyone else tempted to go Road Warrior and started raiding small Alberta towns for their fuel? Lord Humungus, you were a man ahead of your time.
Saturday, August 13 - U.S. fighters accidentally bomb Australia. Accidentally? How do you make that kind of mistake? Australia is its own continent, for crying out loud. There's a Crocodile Hunter joke crying to be made here, but I'm too disgusted to bother.

Saturday, August 20 - I had more fun at Louise McKinney park than the fans at Commonwealth Stadium did watching Damon Allen celebrate his 406th birthday with a win over the Esks, but wouldn't the Dragon Boat races be even better if the boats actually breathed fire at one another? Don't tell me I'm the first person to have thought of this.

Sunday, August 21 - As Edmonton sweltered beneath a blazingly hot sun, a bunch of Fringe-goers did the unthinkable to escape the heat--they actually bought tickets and went to some of the plays.

Monday, August 22 - John Cena remains the lamest WWE champion of all time. If you're reading this and just asked yourself 'John WHO?" you just proved my point exactly.

Tuesday, August 23 - The U.S. continues to encourage energy companies to find sound alternatives to Middle East oil. President George W. Bush recently earmarked $4 billion dollars to explore vehicles that run on "happy thoughts and a handful of pixie dust."

Wednesday, August 24 - The Simpsons DVD set with the Homer's head-shaped box is a great idea--until you have to fit the thing in with the rest of your collection. Did the the manufacturers learn nothing from Total Recall?

Thursday, August 25 - The media has been criticizing PM Paul Martin for rushing his appointment of new Governor General Michaelle Jean. Hey, at least he made a decision this time. Baby steps, folks, baby steps.

Friday, August 26 - Product placement isn't just for NASCAR anymore. The other night I saw a dragon boat with a Texaco sticker on the side. It's going to be entered in the "Second-Star-to-the-Right-and-Straight on til Morning 5000."

Saturday, August 27 - Microsoft announces it will be sponsoring the Edmonton Eskimos football club for the rest of the year. "It's a perfect match," a spokesman enthused. "We're both known for games that don't run very well."

Sunday, August 28 - Local comedian Andrew Iwanyk describes the new Sunday night comedy show at the Thirsty Turtle as 'gladiator comedy.' He's right. It's like 'Soulcalibur' with dirty jokes. Are you not entertained?

Monday, August 29 - At the MTV Video Music Awards, host Sean "P. Diddy, Puffy, Diddy, Living-Example-of-why-Famous-People-Shouldn't-be-Allowed-to-Choose-their-own-Nicknames" Coombs awarded $100 000 prize to the best dressed celebrity "to help pay for gas." Too bad the Province of Ontario wasn't nominated for anything--they could have used that money.

Tuesday, August 30 - Hey, that new kickboxing movie, Ong Pak is out on DVD today. That's a must-buy for me. Maybe I'll pick up some moves I can use at the Thirsty Turtle.

Wednesday , August 31 - I'm tired of the constant wrangling between the police commission and EPS. This is Alberta. Why don't we just privatize law enforcement? It worked in 'Robocop.'

Saturday, August 27, 2005

End of August

Upcoming Shows
Yuk Yuks--Friday, September 2
Yuk Yuks'--Saturday, September 3

-Hope everyone is enjoying the last week of summer. I didn't get to go to the Fringe this year, and I'm doubly disappointed because they put on Chris Craddock's "Boy Groove," which is tied with Marty Chan's "The Bone House" as my favorite play EVER.

-I'm working hard getting ready for these upcoming weekend shows at YUKS. When you're sharing a stage with NICK ROY, you have to be at your best. If you can make it out, come say hi. It's interesting looking back over the past year and seeing how far some guys have come and the unexpected directions people's careers have taken, I'm amazed at the amount of growth there's been. Edmonton is a great city for comedy and with three comedy clubs running plus numerous open mics, there's always plenty of chances to check out some really funny people.

-I'll also be at the Monster Pro Wrestling show on Saturday (check for showtimes and ticket information). I'm not performing or anything, but I will be posting a write-up of the results on the Monster Pro site. If you see me there, come say hi. I'll be the guy with the pen and pad forgetting to write things down because he's busy getting caught up watching the action.

-On another wrestling-related note, I stumbled across on the internet. "Leaping Lanny" aka "The Genius" was one of my favorite wrestlers growing up. He's currently promoting a book of poetry he wrote aimed at keeping kids from smoking. Nothing wrong with that. I dropped him an e-mail and he actually replied, so that was a real thrill. It's not every day you get a message from the World's Smartest Man.

Monday, August 22, 2005

More Updates, Less Title

Thursday, August 25 - Yuk Yuks
Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks
Saturday, September 3 - Yuk Yuks

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in ed magazine, a supplement of the Edmonton Journal

-Well, BLUE CHICAGO is no more. I'll miss it--I'll never forget that magical night where MAX MAULT shaved his head on stage. On the bright side, KATHLEEN MCGEE has opened a new room Sunday nights at the THIRSTY TURTLE just about Funky Pickle on Whyte Ave. This Sunday I caught a great performance there by SHAWN GRAMIAK and the evening was capped by a bunch of great pros: PAUL MYREHAUG (and his lovely and talented assistant KERRY UNGER) and HOWIE MILLER. It was a raucous crowd; ANDREW IWANYK described it as "Gladiator Comedy" and he's not incorrect. Go on down and give it a try.

-I'll be teaching my course on writing Science-Fiction and Fantasy again trhough Metro Continuing Education. It will be running five Mondays starting October 17. If you're interested you can contact them at or phone them at 428-1111.

-As I reported, I'm putting a website together. I've had a few pictures taken (Thanks to Tammi at Storm's Eye Inc. ( and I'm looking to see which ones people like the most. If you want to put your two cents in you can see the pictures and vote at

Wednesday, August 17, 2005


Upcoming Events
Thursday, August 25 - Yuk Yuks
Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks
Saturday, September 3 - Yuk Yuks

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the ed magazine supplement to the Edmonton Journal

-Black Gate magazine contacted me recently asking to see a short story I wrote a few years ago called "The Girl Who Feared Lightning." Weird that this is coming on the heels of my publication in Hellbound Books' 'Cold Flesh' anthology. My fiction career is finally starting to take off, and I've barely written any fiction in the last year or so. Time to get back at it, I guess.

-I've also written a piece for the Monster Pro Wrestling website under the pen name of 'Martial' Art McNeil. You can find it in the Inside MPW section of It's always fun to try something a little different, and I've always been a rasslin' fan at heart, and the MPW are great guys with a great product, so I'm happy to help out.

-August has been a quiet month for me for comedy, but I'm looking forward to my next few shows, especially the weekend shows on September 2 and 3. Hope to see you there.

-Meanwhile, work on my website continues, slowly but surely. I had a photo shoot yesterday, so hopefully my gorgeous mug will be gracing this space soon.

Friday, August 12, 2005

July headLINES (somehow these never got posted)

Upcoming Events
Thursday, August 25 - Yuk Yuks
Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks
Saturday, September 3 - Yuk Yuks

-Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine.

Friday, July 1 - Now thanks to new provincial labor laws, when people say a 12 year old could do your isn't just a figure of speech anymore.

Saturday, July 2 - What a wonderful Canada Day celebration. Using red and white colored tear gas to disperse the rioters on Whyte Avenue was an especially nice touch.

Sunday, July 3 - Oh wait, those weren't rioters, they were people looking for a place to smoke. No wonder the tear gas didn't bother them.

Monday, July 4 - With the NBA draft over, I can't do anymore basketball jokes. In order to fill our weekly sports requirement, it's on to professional wrestling: Ric Flair is so old, when he started doing the figure-four leglock, it was only a figure-one.

Tuesday, July 5 - The Edmonton Public School Board announced the impending closings of three more schools. Apparently, thanks to new government regulations, all our twelve-year olds are at work.

Wednesday, July 6 - Critics are sick of Bono and his meetings with world leaders, claiming, "no one wants to hear what a singer has to say." The 916 viewers of reality shows from "The Osbournes" to "Nick & Jessica" say otherwise.

Thursday, July 7 - Tom Cruise continues to deride the psychiatric profession, which is ironic, because if there's anyone who needs a good shrink, it's him. Even Michael Jackson described Cruise's recent behaviour as "a little over the top."

Friday, July 8 - Summer's here, and everywhere you look, kids are out playing in parks, running through sprinklers, and biking. Why can't they just get jobs?

Saturday, July 9 - A pair of immigrants are suing the Canadian government for false advertising because they couldn't find the jobs they wanted when they moved here. Does that mean I can sue the makers of Irish Spring? I bought their soap based on an ad with an Irish guy surrounded by beautiful women. I've been using the soap for months and I still don't have an accent.

Sunday, July 10 - Calgary Health Region reports that a computer error caused the medical records of 2000 people to be filed under the wrong names. They discovered the error when Calgary radio personality Red Dawg tested positive for pregnancy.

Monday, July 11 - After blasting the Comet Tempel 1 with the Deep Impact probe, NASA. has decided to go ahead and fire probes at more comets. When asked what scientific purpose the blasting serves, NASA spokemen replied: "None, it's just a lot of fun. It's just like shooting Stop signs on a more cosmic scale."

Tuesday, July 12 - The price of oil is so high right now, The U.S. needs find another country to invade, preferably within walking distance to save on gas. It was a nervouse couple of minutes for Canada, but the Americans don't like the cold so they're going after Texas.

Wednesday, July 13 - No word on whether Toronto Argonauts Robert Baker and Noel Prefontaine have fended any fences after their sideline scuffle a couple weeks ago. This is why the CFL is looked at as a second-rate league. In other leagues, athletes know who to take that aggression out on--the fans.

Thursday, July 14 - Georges Laraques is giving out relationship advice on the Bounce. His first callers were 'Rob and Noel from Toronto.'

Friday, July 15 - The war in Texas is not going well for the U.S. Apparently, Texans have weapons of mass destruction. The 131st Airborne was held off by a pair of Houston eleven year olds with My First Magnum starter kits.

Saturday, July 16 - The said to ed mailbag overflows with complaints about the scantily clad Grand Prix girls on the cover of a recent issue. It wasn't our fault. The original plans were for a cover featuring the 'Men of the Gravel Trucker's Union,' but at the time they were still on strike.

Sunday, July 17 - The Black Eyed Peas' Fergie shows off her dance skills at a concert at Rexall Place. She looks like a bee showing the rest of the hive where the honey is. In other entertainment news, Eminem is rumored to be leaving rap to pursue other interests--as long those interest don't involve Katie Holmes or Scientology, that's fine with me.

Monday, July 18 - Senator Collin Kenny says Canadians are unprepared for a terrorist attack. I think he underestimates our mental toughness. We didn't even blink when the NHL held hockey hostage for a year.

Tuesday, July 19 - According to rumor, Brad Pitt could be in Fort Edmonton RIGHT NOW working on a movie, but everything is being kept top secret. Don't worry though--I'll have all the answers once I confirm a couple details with Karl Rove.

Wednesday, July 20 - Amazing how our culture has changed. Fifty years ago when an unmarried woman got pregnant, she had to leave town to have the baby. The other day I saw a girl with SLUT written in rhinestones across the front of her maternity dress.

Thursday, July 21 - The Catholic Church claims reading the Harry Potter books makes it hard for children to distinguish between good and evil. I guess they should know--a few of their priests face the same challenge.

Friday, July 22 -
Okay, maybe I have a LITTLE Sudoku problem.

Saturday, July 23 - Telus says despite recent labour troubles, they'll maintain the same level of service that we've come to expect from the telecommunications company. Do I even need to add a joke here or does that sentence pretty much speak for itself? That's what I thought.

Sunday, July 24 - Some guy called Canadian males apathetic. Whatever.

Commentary: Sorry, Lars. You know why.

Monday, July 25 - My message to Telus. "Your labour problems are important to me...Please stay on the line an wait for the next available operator. Your labour problems are important to me...Please stay on the line or wait for the next available..."

Tuesday, July 26 - A couple of B.C. men dug a tunnel beneath the U.S. border so they could smuggle pot into the U.S. "Hey, there was no hockey," one of them said. "We had to fill the time somehow."

Wednesday, July 27 - Bands coming through town over the next few months include: System of a Down, Queensryche, Motley Crue (again!), Judas Priest, Megadeth, Anthrax, KMFDM, and Nine Inch Nails. It's a great time for metal fans...and a terrible time for metal fans' credit cards

Thursday, July 28 - With all my metalhead buddies off to watch the Sounds of the Underground show at Rexall and my goth posse attending the Pocket Universe show at New City, it's a great night to dust off the old Kylie Minogue albums.

Friday, July 29 - I'm still upset that guy called me apathetic. There are lots of issues I care deeply about--such as the Klassic Kung Fu Kollection on DVD and my Big Brother 6 Fantasy Team.

Saturday, July 30 - The Danish are coming! The Danish are coming! I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm willing to fight with every drop of blood in my body to defend Hans Island's exalted shores...too bad I have no idea where it is.

Sunday, July 31 - We'll fight them on the beaches. We'll fight them on the landing grounds. We'll fight them on the mainland, in the bars, and by the foosball tables. We'll defend our island. If the Danish invade, they'll face the toddler of all battles.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Latest News

Upcoming Gigs:

Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks (co-middling)
Saturday, September 3 Yuk Yuks (co-middling)

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the ed magazine supplement to the Edmonton Journal.

-I've been writing a few profiles this month for ed magazine. In addition to singer/songwriter CHRISTINA SCHMOLKE, I've written about a suspension artist/DJ/metal artist named SCOTT "DJ DERVISH" Fox, who will be doing some suspension on August 13 at Dragon FX in Kingsway Mall. For tix, contact To see a sneak preview, check Scott out at I'm also working on an article about "YOUNG LION" BOBBY SHARP the 16 year old wrestling phenom who is the reigning MPW Junior Heavyweight Champion. He'll be defending his title against "ALL STAR" TOM MACDONALD at the MPW Back to School Extravaganza on September 3 (why not go to the show, and then come by Yuk Yuks to watch my comedy--an entertainment double feature). I've seen both Bobby and Tom wrestle, so I think if you're a rasslin' fan (and who isn't?), you should go to and see how you can get tickets.

-I just found out that PAUL MYREHAUG will be the MC on my first two co-middling performances at Yuk Yuks. Paul also was the MC the first night I went on stage doing comedy back in October 2004. Strange, but cool. I hope you're writing this down--this kind of trivia might be worth something some day.

-headLINES should be up in a couple days, with or without commentary (I know, I'm getting lazier--or possibly just less self-indulgent)

-Looks like OLIVIA CHENG is really living her dream--getting raped by DWIGHT YOAKAM. Olivia's got a part as a Chinese prostitute in a movie starring none other than ROBERT DUVALL. She wasn't kidding a few weeks ago when she said she had big things in store. I have to admit to being a bit jealous--after all, I'm a huge Dwight Yoakam fan.

-Incidentally, I caught a couple of great acts at the Folk Fest this year: The WARSAW VILLAGE BAND and RUTHIE FOSTER. If you get a chance to check them out, I'd recommend them. If your of a more metallic slant, BILL GEE made me a compilation disc of some acts, and I'm really digging a group called TRIVIUM.

Friday, July 29, 2005


Upcoming Comedy
Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks
Saturday, September 3 - Yuk Yuks

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the ed section of the Edmonton Journal.

-Not much to report this week, at least nothing that would interest anyone. Behind the scenes, I'm busy as ever, but writing and rehearsing is never as fun to read about as all the excitment of the finished product.

-I met DEREK EDWARDS last night. He's one of the top comics in Canada, and he had some nice things to say about my work. He doesn't seem to get a lot of publicity, but he's at Yuk Yuks all weekend so be sure to go see him. You know how sometimes the movies say, "If you see just one movie this year..?" Well if you see just one live comedy show this year, go watch Derek. WINSTON HERBERT, another funny guy, who's been doing some music with KERRY UNGER is hosting and TODD K ( for some of the most addictive games on the net) and STEVE MCCARTHY are also on the bill.

-The last few weeks at Blue Chicago (hosted by KATHLEEN MCGEE--but you knew that already) have been a lot of fun, not just for the shows, but for hanging out with other comics. A couple weeks ago MAX MAULT had us in hysterics with his inability to distinguish between a rye and Coke and a rum and Coke despite his wild assertions to the contrary("I'm a BARTENDER! I'm a professional! I CAN tell the difference!) and last week I had a great time just chillin' with Kathleen, ANDREW IWANYK, and TRAVIS ROBINSON after the show. Good times.

-July headLINES should be up next week.

Monday, July 25, 2005

Thursday, July 28 - Yuk Yuks
Friday, September 2 - Yuk Yuks
Saturday, September 3 -Yuk Yuks

-Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine.
-Dan Brodribb's short story 'Glass Houses' can be found in the anthology 'Cold Flesh' available through Hellbound books at

-I got a nice feature in the Journal on Friday about my dad's suit. The funny thing is, I didn't know it was running that day, so I nearly missed it. I was really happy with the picture. The photo shoot was a lot of fun, and the photographer (I remember her name as Candice, but I've been wrong before) did a great job as did my 'director' Caroline.

-I finally got my copy of Cold Flesh. It looks great, and if you're a fan of the zombie literature, you can pick it up through

-Good luck to everyone who went out to audition for that Jesse James movie whose title I can't remember. I heard there was a line of people stretching all around the hotel where they were auditioning, so just making it inside the building is an accomplishment.

-Finally, I'm waiting on an article about CHRISTINA SCHMOLKE to see print. She's a fantastic singer/songwriter and she'll be the house musician at THE MELTING POT restaraunt once September rolls around. She's just finishing up a new demo, so see her now for free while you have the chance. She's got the talent to go very far.

-Those of you with strong stomachs might want to check out the SUSPENSION BARBECUE on August 13. Suspension is where they take a willing participant (in this case, my good friend DJ DERVISH) and hang him from hooks. Don't try this at home kids. Anyway, tickets are 20 bucks and it starts at 6 pm at 20910-7th avenue.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Update (need a better title)

Upcoming Comedy Dates
Sunday, July 17 - The Comic Strip (5 min)
Monday, July 18 - Blue Chicago
Sunday, July 24 - The Comic Strip (5 min)
Monday, July 24 - Blue Chicago
Thursday, July 28 - Yuk Yuks (10 min)

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine supplement

-One of my columns might be getting a feature position in the Journal. I'm looking forward to that. Ultimately, I'd like to be writing humor columns on a weekly basis, but we'll have to see. My schedule is getting pretty tight.

-I did a little acting in a video shoot for the United Way last week. It was great getting back in front of the camera again. Time to start clearing a shelf for my Academy Award. The United Way is a great organization and they do a lot for the community, so if you can find time or money to donate, it all goes back into helping various community organizations, so ultimately it's coming back to all of us.

-I got a note from the Walt Hicks at Hellbound Books ( My contributor's copy of 'Cold Flesh' is in the mail, which of course includes my short story 'Glass Houses.' I can't wait to read some of the other stories in it. Go to the website to find out how you can get your own copy. If you bring it to a show, I'd even be happy to sign it--you never know--it might be worth something someday.

-I'm really enjoying working on comedy at BLUE CHICAGO every Monday. They have great fries and steaks, and it's a great room to work on new things in and watch other comics do new things. If you're the kind of person who doesn't mind expecting the unexpected, or if you've ever wanted to try comedy yourself, why not give it a try? KATHLEEN MCGEE hosts, and she loves seeing new blood on stage (not literally). We're a pretty supportive group, so if you want to come down and see if you have what it takes, you're always welcome.

-I did a show in Fairview last Thursday with TYLER HAWKINS, a very funny comedian. We spent the whole drive talking about 80s metal, 80s TV shows, and dinosaurs. Good times.

Monday, July 11, 2005

June headLINES

Ta Daa!

Wednesday, June 1 - Ex-American Idol contestant Corey Clark is upset at an SNL skit spoofing his alleged affair with judge Paula Abdul. He doesn't think people are respecting his accomplishments. What accomplishment? Most people have 'losing a talent show' on their resume by sixth grade.

Thursday, June 2 - Women are reporting that birth control pills are lowering their sex drive. At least that's the excuse they're using when they don't want to say anything bad about their husband's new moustache.

Friday, June 3 - Meanwhile, men are reporting that Viagra is causing blindness among some users. At least that's the excuse they're using when their wife finds them in bed with the woman next door.

COMMENTARY: There were no headlines for June 4-12. I got squeezed out due to lack of space.

Saturday, June 11 - Bad news for Esks fans as Ricky Ray will be sidelined for a game with a knee injury, meaning the team is down to just 1 604 quarterbacks.

Sunday, June 12 - Russell Crowe signs an endorsement deal with a famous phone company. They're even bringing back their old slogan: "Reach out and Touch Someone."

Monday, June 13 - The EPS chief has vowed a crackdown after a racist e-mail containing "10 Ways to deal with natives" circulated through the department. Normally I'd recommend police to leave the top-10 lists to ed and concentrate on doing what they do best, but I want to be able to drink at Overtime in peace.

COMMENTARY: If you’re a police officer reading this…sorry. I recognize it’s a tough job, but you guys have been making yourselves easy targets lately. Still, I should probably stop doing the same.

Tuesday, June 14 - Since every other article in this issue is about the Edmonton Eskimos, can I write ONE NBA joke? Just one? You see, there's this thing going being decided in basketball right now called a "championship..." Sigh. Why do I even bother?

Wednesday, June 15 - Apparently U.S President George W. Bush had better
marks in college than the Democratic challenger John Kerry. That was close--the last thing the U.S. needs is a stupid president.

Thursday, June 16 - In Detroit, during the NBA finals a fan throws a half-full cup of beer at San Antonio Spurs' guard, Tony Parker who hails from France. Parker immediately surrenders.

Friday, June 17 - My native friend's message to the police re: the
infamous top 10 list: "E-mail jokes to each other all you want, just stop SHOOTING me already."

Saturday, June 18 - Flooding is the latest natural disaster to hit Alberta, leaving most of Calgary submerged. The Calgary Stampede will go ahead as planned, although this is the first year participants and horses in the chuckwagon races have had to be equipped with snorkels.

Sunday, June 19 - NBA officials deny that their referees are either incompetent or out-and-out biased in favor of the home team. To ensure that game five in Detroit is called squarely down the middle, they've even appointed a special guest referee--Kid Rock.

Monday, June 20 - How come Edmonton Pride week is ten days long? I don't mind our mayor signing off on gay pride, but a ten-day week? This metric system is getting way out of hand.

Tuesday, June 21 - I don't want to say NBA referees are bad, but the guy working game 6 of the finals is the only ref ever kicked off of Wrestlemania for incompetence. NBA Commisioner David Stern counters allegations of referee corruption, pointing out, "If the playoffs were fixed, do you think we'd be watching a Spurs-Pistons finals?"

Wednesday, June 22 - Between the forest fires, floods, and droughts that have plagued this province over the past few years, I'm beginning to think Mother Nature is trying to tell us something. If a volcano erupts and buries Spruce Grove under a sea of molten lava, I'm moving.

Thursday, June 23 - According to a new study, exposure to sunlight helps reduce the risk of prostate cancer. But how do you tan where the sun don't shine?

Friday, June 24 - I think the show Celebrity Boxing would be a lot better if they only had one celebrity...against one real boxer. I'd like to see Sergio 'The Latin Snake' Mora take on Bob Saget. That would be a funny home video.

COMMENTARY: This is a variation of a throwaway line I came up with in Fairview. KERRY UNGER told me it would make a good joke. I tried this one live, and he was right…but that’s why he’s Kerry Unger.

This week, in honour of Canada Day, we take a look back at some great headLINES moments from Canadian history.

Saturday, June 25 - (1001 AD) Vikings arrive on the coast of Nefoundland. They are unable to find work, and immediately move to Fort McMurray.

Sunday, June 26 - (1836) Aspiring lawyer and politician Sir John A. MacDonald is admitted to the bar of Upper Canada. It takes the bartender, two waitresses, and six bouncers to get him out again.

Monday, June 27 - (September 9, 1972) Maybe the reason the Canadian hockey team has played so poorly at home against the USSR is the dollar bill we buried under the ice is getting all soggy. Next time, maybe we should try a coin or something.

Tuesday, June 28 - (July 14, 1985) Boy, that Live Aid show was one for the ages. I wonder if they'll ever do something like that again only with Canadian acts.

Wednesday, June 29 - (December 13, 1985) Platinum Blonde is the raddest band ever. In thirty years, we'll still be talking about 'Alien Shores.' It's 'The White Album' of our generation.

Thursday, June 30 - (January 31, 2003) Say what you will about the EPS, they're way tougher than the Collier County Deputies that arrested Alex Lifeson on New Year's. Six officers with tasers and truncheons to take down the lead guitarist for Rush? That's not a story I'd be telling back at the station.

Monday, June 27, 2005


-Thursday, June 30 - Yuk Yuks Edmonton (guest spot) (CANCELLED)
-Tuesday, July 12 - The Blarney Stone, Lethbridge
-Thursday, July 14 - Grand Hotel, Fairview
-Sunday, July 17, Edmonton-The Comic Strip (guest spot)

-Sunday, July 24, Edmonton- The Comic Strip (guest spot)

Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Edmonton Journal's ed magazine.

-In case you're wondering, KENDALL GAWRYLUK won Comedy Idol, with SEAN LECOMBER finishing second. Thanks to everyone at Yuks, as well as our judges (HOLLY ROBSON from K-Rock, STEVE TILLEY from the EDMONTON SUN, Yuks' CHRYSI RUBIN, and comic ANDREW GROSE), and of course the people who came out and supported us. It was a great time.

-Metro Cinema and FAVA are working together to screen some short films by a bunch of local filmmakers. And Brodribb-philes will spot me doing a cameo in GEO (I'm not even going to try and spell his last name--but if someone wants to e-mail me the correct spelling, I'd appreciate it)'s 16mm movie, "Accord."

-I caught HARLAND WILLIAMS at Yuks on Saturday, although TOBY HARGRAVES, a very funny guy, plied me with alcohol that I was seeing two Harland's by the end of the night. Toby's a great guy, who's soon moving to Vancouver, but if you get a chance to see him, he has some very funny bits, especially if you like thoughtful, political comedy.

-DARYL MAKK--who MC'd Comedy Idol let me know about Vex magazine, a men's magazine based out of Calgary. I just got a copy, and it's pretty cool. Find out what it's all about at

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Comedy Idol & Updates

-The finalists have been decided for tonight's Comedy Idol showdown. KENDALL GAWRYLUK took the Judge's Choice, and KELLY SOLODUKA won the People's Choice. SHAWN GRAMIUK and POWERMANN also had fantastic sets. Judge and EDMONTON SUN columnist STEVE TILLEY put it best when he commented that basically three or four guys had great sets. Two of them would advance and two of them would get screwed.

For those of you keeping score at home, this is the line-up for the Finals tonight at Yuk Yuks:

Looking at the list of finalists, not only are they very good comedians, they're all great people as well. It should be a great night. The Edmonton comedy scene has always been very supportive. Even a lot of the local professionals have been coming down to watch the shows and give us tips and support. I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be doing comedy.

One of the reasons I hate comedy and writing contests is because it implies that the comedians or writers who end up in the prize rounds are 'better' than the ones who didn't. In the case of Comedy Idol, a lot of guys didn't make it to the finals simply because of the numbers game--NAVIN PRATAP, SHAWN GRAMIUK, POWERMANN, and TODD KREPAKEVICH are all fine comics and deserve to be seen. The good news is, all of them perform around town on a fairly regular basis, which mean there should be plenty of opportunities for you (yes, I mean you personally) to go out and see them either at the comedy clubs or the open mics around town like Blue Chicago (organized by KATHLEEN MCGEE) , Brado's (sp?) (organized by SEAN BAPTISTE) and a couple rooms run by BRIAN HEGGE.

-JEFF L. BURKE is starting work on his first feature film called FRITZ, and I auditioned for a part. This is a project Jeff has been working on for sometime, so it's great to see him finally getting the opportunity to realize his dream. I wish him all the best.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Comedy Idol

Saturday, June 18 - Waugh Hall, Waugh, Alberta
Sunday, June 19 - The Comic Strip, Edmonton
Wednesday, June 22 - Yuk Yuks, Comedy Idol Finals
Tuesday, July 12 - The Blarney Stone, Lethbridge, Alberta
Thursday, July 14 - Grand Hotel, Fairview, Alberta

-Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the ed magazine supplement to the Edmonton Journal
-Columns in the Journal's Living Section every Sunday through June

-Another fantastic week at Comedy Idol. ANDREW IWANYK won the judge's choice with a great set. TRAVIS ROBINSON was solid and polished and good enough to win the People's Choice. BILL GEE was his usual rage-filled self. He's reminds me of a Cabbage Patch Kid infected with the '28 Days Later' virus. JAMES KERR had a really funny bit about bees. MATTHEW WOJCICKI was a pleasant surprise. "Moon Unit" MAX MAULT pulled a hamstring at some point in his scenery-chewing performance piece(He's the Cactus Jack of comedy--The only thing he hasn't done yet is throw himself through the brick wall at the back of the stage.). Never let it be said that we don't suffer for our art.

--ANDREW "Eagle-Eye" IWANYK picked Journal and Global media personality OLIVIA CHENG ( out of the crowd at BLUE CHICAGO on Monday (What? You weren't there? You're missing out). He convinced me to introduce myself, and I learned that there are some pretty big things in her future...but I don't want to ruin the surprise. Who knows what celebrities we'll see next Mondays at Blue Chicago? Come on down and find out.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

May headLINES and Comedy Idol report

Thursday, June 8 - Fairview, Alberta w/KERRY UNGER
Saturday, June 18 - Gigglefest 2005 - Waugh, Alberta
Sunday, June, 19 - The Comic Strip (guest spot)
Wednesday, June 22 Comedy Idol Finals at Yuk Yuks-
Tuesday, July 12 - Lethbridge, Alberta
Thursday, July 14 - Fairview, Alberta

-Columns appearing through June in the Sunday Living section of the Edmonton Journal.
-Dan Brodribb's headLINES appears every Saturday in the Journal's ed magazine (except this Saturday for space reasons)
-My short stroy "Glass Houses" appears in the zombie anthology Cold Flesh. For information on getting a copy, check out

-MARK SALAMANDICK and I advanced to the Comedy Idol finals, which will be held on June 22 at Yuk Yuks. I decided to try Angie Ismond's way of preparing for a show--working myself into a frenzy of near-hysterical terror and hoping it comes off on stage as 'intensity.' The good news is I won; the bad new is my set was fundamentally sloppy and I had worked myself into such a fever pitch it took me until five o'clock the next afternoon to actually start relaxing again. I suspect any short-term benefits of the Ismond Method are outweighed by the long-term side-effects, at least for me.

-In a weird way, the highlight of the night was CECIL GARFIN's set. Say what you will about Cecil's future prospects in comedy (which are--to put it mildly--rather dim), I learned something from him. He might be the most technically horrific comedian in human history, but he remembered to have a good time on stage and he got off when the light started flashing, so judges choice aside, he still finished way ahead of me in my book.

-At the last minute I got asked to go to Fairview with Kerry Unger. I've spoken about him in past posts. He seems to be a great guy and I love the cut of his joke-writing jib, so I'm looking forward to picking his brain.

-I've begun work on the script for the zombie film. I've been bouncing ideas off the director and producer, and am starting to massage the story into shape. Ahh, preproduction. Funny that all the glitz and glamor in the movies starts with one guy sitting in his sweatpants swearing at a blank Word document.

(Added June 10) Comedian TODD KREPAKEVICH made a nice mention of me on his website ( when he said "that Dan boy, he just gets better and better all the time." I'm not sure if he was referring to my comedy or the my high scores on the games section of his web page. Check out the Memory Game and see some funny faces--score a Yahtzee and get a cool surprise.

on to headLINES:

Sunday, May 1 - One of my friends was appalled to discover that his new almost-girfriend was wearing a special bra that mimics implants. "I thought she had fake breasts, but she was only pretending," he complained. "If she can't afford the surgery, there's no way she can pay off my MasterCard. Next time, I'm asking to see the scars first."

COMMENTARY: This was inspired by an article written by the great Misty Harris.

Monday, May 2 - Like hockey? Enjoy drowning? Check out What's next: Curling in space? Why not? Ferbey's already beaten everyone on THIS planet.

Tuesday, May 3 - Hard to believe this is Reggie Miller's final NBA play-offs. Retiring or not, if the fate of the world ever hinges on a last second three-point jump shot, I know who I'd call.

Wednesday, May 4 - One of my friends is taking karate classes and isn't sure she can handle it. This is the same girl who joined a hockey league and started a fight in her first game. Too bad it was with a member of her own team. She said, "The bitch was wearing the same outfit as me."

COMMENTARY: Believe it or not, this joke took me months to write, and I’m still not completely satisfied with it. Also, for someone who writes topical material, putting out a hockey joke in spring might not be much of a testament to my skills.

Thursday, May 5 - Looks like we may have an election this spring or summer. Now all we need is someone worth voting for.

COMMMENTARY: Bleh. This joke is as old as democracy. It was a ‘filler’ line I forgot to replace. I take a lot of pride in writing my own material, so seeing this in print was tough to take.

Friday, May 6- Paris Hilton is in a movie called 'House of Wax' about a bunch of people trapped in a museum with some wax statues. "They're so life-like," coos one of the characters about the statues. Too bad we couldn't say the same for Paris' acting.

Saturday, May 7 - After learning that I'd never seen the movie Dirty Dancing, a woman I know forced me to watch it. I did NOT have the time of my life.

Sunday, May 8 - Steve Nash becomes the first Canadian to win the NBA's Most Valuable Player award. As one of only fourteen basketball fans in Canada, I hate to be an I-told-you-so but...who am I kidding? I never saw this coming.

Monday, May 9 - During game 1 of the Pistons-Pacers NBA series, Ron Artest--who was suspended for his role in a brawl between the two teams back in November runs out of the stands and attacks the Pistons, using a chair to knock out Tayshaun Prince and then choke-slamming Rip Hamilton through a table. Now that's basketball.

Tuesday, May 10 - Lots of exciting stuff happening in a couple of weeks. Local zombie movie "Kill & Kleen" opens, Comedy Idol gets underway...and Boston Rob and Amber are getting married on TV. Looks like I'm going to have to take time off work.

Wednesday, May11 - Members of the Texas House of Representatives wave pom-poms to celebrate the passing of the 'Sexy Cheerleader Bill.' No word on how they're going to celebrate the passing of the 'Naughty Schoolgirl Bill' later this week, but I don't like the look of those plaid skirts.

Thursday, May 12 - My friend's on vacation in France, but the language barrier is causing problems for her. Someone asked how she was doing, and she couldn't remember the French word for 'comme-ci comme-ca.'

Friday, May 13 - They say Friday the 13th is bad luck, but so far it's been great. I spent all day getting ready for a date with a very special lady this weekend. I'm very excited. Last year, I completely forgot about Mother's Day.

Saturday, May 14 - Local band Mammoth plays their last show. They didn't get the same send-off as Everybody Loves Raymond, but their fans will miss them all the same.

Sunday, May 15 - On Survivor, firefighter Tom escapes the Ghosts of the Ulong with a million dollars. His co-workers are happy to have him back, except for the fact that every time he's on shift, the temperature drops and the firehouse walls start bleeding.

Monday, May 16 - World Hockey officials discover the reason the Czech Republic won the gold-medal game is because they had buried a 50 Koruna bill beneath centre ice. Even the hockey gods are all about the money now.

COMMENTARY: The Czech Republic currency is called the Koruna after the Czech word for Crown. I like to educate as well as entertain.

Tuesday, May 17 - CSIS warns parents that al-Qaeda is scouring the internet recruiting disaffected Canadian teens. It's a short step from downloading MP3s and shoplifing AFI hoodies to fighting a holy war. Think of all the weapons they could hide in those baggy pants.

Wednesday, May 18 - The Jennifer Wilbanks story continues to capture the public imagination. She was the 'runaway bride' who led investigators on an amazing race. Boston Rob and Amber are furious, claiming "That's our gimmick!" They're planning on suing Wilbanks for stealing four of their fifteen minutes of fame.

Thursday, May 19 - Conservatives are angry they had to come in today to vote on the government's future. "It should have been decided last week," one Grit said. "Now we have to rush to be ready for the Star Wars premiere. Stormtrooper helmets don't paint themselves, you know."

Friday, May 20 - Hollywood released a movie called Alien vs. Predator a while back under the tagline: "No matter who wins...we lose." Who knew they were talking about the Canadian Federal Legislature?

Saturday, May 21 - Saddam Hussein: Lousy leader...worse underwear model. If that's Victoria's secret, I wish she'd kept it.

Sunday, May 22 - This has been one of the most exciting NBA playoffs ever, and it's only getting better. The NBA plans to take advantage of their momentum this summer with a fast-paced and electrifying LOCKOUT! The NBA has many charms, but learning from other sports' mistakes isn't one of them.

COMMENTARY: I don’t know why, but these playoffs have been electrifying. Reggie Miller’s retirement, the Bulls comeback, the Nash/Shaq MVP controversy, the four-way dance between the Heat, Pistons, Spurs, and Suns…any one of which could conceivably take the gold…it’s been fantastic.

Monday, May 23 - A black bear is filing suit against the city after being taken down on the way to his job doing voice work for radio station 1000.3. EPS deny the charges, claiming they tasered the bear because he was resisting arrest and not because he was black.

Tuesday, May 24 - The Royal visit was nearly a disaster as the Queen was completely unprepared for her meeting with Ralph Klein. She had to borrow Rod Love's fishing rod.

Wednesday, May 25 - Metal Edge, a heavy metal magazine, is celebrating its 20th anniversary this month. It's too bad glam-metal is over. Don Dokken would look very pretty jumping out of a cake.

COMMENTARY: You all remember Don Dokken, right? Right? Sigh.

Thursday, May 26 - Website of the Week: Check out to hear the new Nine Inch Nails single remixed with Ray Parker Jr.'s "Ghostbusters" and Britney Spears "Toxic." Some people have too much time on their hands--and without them the world would be a much duller place.

Friday, May 27 - Don Dokken and Saddam Hussein were unfortunately unavailable to jump out of the cake at Metal Edge's anniversary bash. They tried to get Bo Bice as a last-minute replacement, but when they called, Paula Abdul answered the phone.

COMMENTARY: My first heavy metal album was Dokken’s ‘Tooth and Nail’ on cassette. I wish more people remembered them. It’s a funny name.

Saturday, May 28 -- At the Monster Pro Wrestling show, local boys Kris Knight and "Allstar" Tom MacDonald put on one of the best matches I've ever seen. The best part: Meeting Knight's mother in the hallway outside: "I can't believe he smashed the toy truck I gave him for Christmas over 'Allstar's' head." Next time you decide to try a DDT through a chain link fence, young man, maybe you should think about what you're doing to your mother.

COMMENTARY: True story. Also a great match, and a good bunch of guys. Show them love at

Sunday, May 29 - France says rejects the EU constitution, throwing the European bloc into chaos. Canada offers to send Brian Mulroney to help mediate the chaos. I hear Meech Lake is beautiful this time of year...

COMMENTARY: History repeats itself. It’s a good thing I paid attention that day in Social Studies.

Monday, May 30- A U.S. research vessel reports they've discovered the remains of the lost island of Atlantis off the Atlantic coast. Apparently the capital of Atlantis is 'Halifax.'

Tuesday, May 31 - As a cost-saving measure, the federal government announces plans to replace our military personnel with clowns. That way all our forces can fit into one tank.

COMMENTARY: I like this joke enough that I coupled it with my other military joke from way back on January 18 and included them in my stand-up set.